Bent Over Backwards

Sometimes I feel like I’ve done all I can to ease the pain — yet it continues. Finally, I realize that there is nothing left to do but just accept it. I’ve heard that Guruji said “Pain is inevitable and suffering is a choice.” It sounds so simple. Simple, it is NOT. It’s downright complicated and unpredictable. Sometimes I feel strong and flexible. Other times, I feel weak and feeble.

This past week, after having gone through the majority of my practice, waiting for the pain to melt away  — yet it continued. As I got closer and closer to kapotasana, I wondered if I should just roll up my mat and call it a day. After all, it’s such an intense backbend. Instead of rolling it up, I proceeded with caution. My teacher came over to assist me, in my second attempt. A little unsure if I was up for the task, I gave her my hands and let her take me deeper into the pose. It was intense yet, when I came out of it, I was hit with a surprising sense of relief. I mean: my back pain was gone!

Every day is different.

I’ve been trying to allow for ease and leave room for doing a lighter practice when my body calls for it. Skipping vinyasa, not trying so hard to lift up and attempt to “float” back — and still I feel like the discomfort never lightens up. It’s so different from my marathoning days when a 20-mile run would be followed by a classic soreness but a 3 mile easy run would renew me. These days, even the rest days are followed with soreness. I wonder: Was it all an inevitable part of getting old? Or am I doing something wrong?

To be honest, I think if I could use that same mentality of acknowledging the inevitability of DOMS following each and ever practice, it would be easier to just accept it. And why not? Bending over backwards (coupled with everything leading up it) isn’t any easier than running 10 miles.

Right?